condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to
have sex again.
BOTTLE FEEDING: An
opportunity for Daddy to get up at 2am too.
DEFENSE: What you'd
better have around de yard if you're going to let de children
teething babies wash their chins.
One who asks if the kids would care to order
The art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to
keep you on the edge of financial disaster
inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the
FULL NAME: What you
call your child when you're mad at him.
people who think your children are wonderful even though
they're sure you're not raising them right.
toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.
INDEPENDENT: How we want our children to
be as long as they do everything we say.
LOOK OUT!: What
it's too late for your child to do by the time you scream it
When your life was still somewhat your own.
A contradiction in terms.
PUDDLE: A small
body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes
SHOW OFF: A child
who is more talented than yours.
STERILIZE: What you
do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and to your
last baby's pacifier by blowing on it
distance required between the supermarket aisles so that
children in shopping carts can't quite reach anything.
What you should keep to a minimum so as to not upset the
TOP BUNK: Where you
should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.
When the baby's face turns red and she begins to make those
familiar grunting noises.
VERBAL: Able to
whine in words
WEAKER SEX: The
kind you have after the kids have worn you out.
WHODUNIT: None of
the kids that live in your house.
exclamation that translates roughly into "get a sponge."